miss the mark momma

I get home from work, from picking up the boys trying to get supper fixed and my little one is screaming, something is obviously wrong; he wants attention, a bottle, a new diaper, something. So I stop do all of the above and he is still screaming, I have Deep and it starts at seven and I’m trying to just take care of my family but Kason’s cries for me are more and more on my nerves, needless to say we are walking out of the door my husband asks me if I’m ok, of course I’m ok….NOT! But just as I’m out the door the slightest thing sets me off and I yell at my children and am rude to my husband. Blah I failed. I’m an impatient mom, and rude wife.

I get to Deep sit in a seat and feel awful. I want to grab my kids hug them tell them I’m sorry and I love them and the same with my husband I want to call him and tell him to forgive me. Why do we get so overwhelmed with everyday things? Like really I could have taken ten minutes and really spent time with my little one, I could have taken five minutes and just expressed my frustrations to my husband instead of a snide comment. But it didn’t happen that way. But you know what it is ok. God still loves me and his grace and mercy has covered that. The important thing is that I learned a lesson last night, my family is my purpose and yes it is my responsibility to feed them, it’s more important that I nurture and take care of the relationships that I have with each one of them.

So take some advice from this miss the mark momma, she will no longer dwell on the mistakes she makes. She will ask for forgiveness, learn, and determine to do better next time. Because the God I serve loves me and wants nothing more but for me to succeed and be the woman he created me to be, and the beauty in that is He wants the very same thing for you! He loves us all THAT much! <3

Branches

There is so much on my heart that I don't even know where to start so I'm sorry if this sounds all over the place but ready, set, here it goes. I went to Houston about two weeks ago, I went because honestly I wanted to develop relationships with women who were wanting to get to know Jesus on another level, my goal was to make friends who I could do life with and who could help me and give me the counsel I know that I need, and well did God accomplish that or what. Seriously if you want something from him all you need to do is make it known and I promise you he will deliver in a way that you can't even imagine on your own.

And just a little back story I almost didn't even go to Houston, I was like I can't leave my kids, who is going to do everything I do, I don't want to leave all of this for Michael while he is so busy with work I mean really the list goes on and on but all it was, the enemy, trying to get me to miss out and keep me at a level where he can control me. WELL NOT ME!

So I'm so excited and happy I went because honestly I was at a point when I was questioning my church going, my volunteering, I needed that time to be stirred up to be reminded why it is I do life with GOD.

John 15 talks about how Jesus is the vine and God is the gardener and we are the branches. Well it's true. Jesus is the only way that we can be connected with the Father, we need him to have any type of success in our lives. The father is the gardener and decided what stays and what goes; but the ultimate decision if we are successful branches is up to us. Jesus can't and won't make us do anything, just like the trip to Houston he knew that it was exactly what I needed but he couldn't physically put me on the plane and make me go. I had to decided for myself if I wanted to grow and get on another faith level. Just like you do. You have to decided for yourself exactly what you want out of life and go for it no one else is going to do that for you except for you. So just in that same way we have to always stay connected with the vine because truly it can give us exactly what we need for that moment, if we choose to do things our own way, which in my case to stay home with the kids taking care of my home and helping Michael I wouldn't have gotten fed the way that God knew that I needed. And because I choose my way instead of what He had for me, my branch would have died a little bit. And let me tell you I don't want to become a dead branch or a weed because let's face it who wants a dead empty life figuring out things on their own when all you have to do is invite God, do life with him and he will give you everything you want and then some. I don't know about you but I want to flourish, in such a way that my family is full of love joy and peace, that my children know that they don't have to experiment and go off and do their own thing that they were made for more! To be leaders, to have a voice that stands out above the crowd to know that they are secure in the LOVE of the most high GOD! Seriously what greater thing than to be loved like you've never been loved before?!?!?! Why would you pass that up? DON'T!!!!!!

And you know what I'm glad I didn't, I'm going to purpose to be more like him. To show love, to be kind, to help out even when I don't feel like it because I want to be a branch that produces the most beautiful fruit, not because I want to be proud and say look what I did, but because I want to say look what God can do, if he can do it for me, he most certainly will do it for you!!!!

Fruit

Fruit; yummy red ripe sweet strawberry. That's what I think of when I see the word fruit. You don't tend to think white, fuzzy, molded over, losing its brightness red strawberry do you? Of course not!! Who wants to eat a rotten piece of fruit? No one. So why when we look at ourselves in the mirror do we see imperfections? Mold or fuzz so to speak?  I will tell you why because we buy into the lie of the world, of the enemy who says we aren't small enough, or your hair isn't fixed in the right way, your jeans arent the brand they need to be or whatever lame excuse about your face or your nose or whatever. NO! You are beautiful and so loved by God. So loved by God. 

Listen in Houston I wrote down in my notes this question. Why don't I love myself? You want to know what I wrote? "Because the world says I am not beautiful" how retarded is that? Really Francheska you have this extravagant love the Jesus poured out for you. Get over what the world says and find your amazing worth in the Father. 

Then I feel like I was hit with bricks!! Duh God loves you wake up and smell the coffee just because you aren't a size two doesn't make you worthless. The ugly little liar called Satan wants to keep you under this lie, this spell that you can't achieve anything because your appearance isnt flattering to the world. Well I've got news for you. I have had a huge revelation that because I'm not a picture perfect size I still am going to make a difference; if it means smiling or going out of my comfort zone to talk to people I really don't know well for fear of rejection. I'm not ever going to be rejected because guess what I'm good ripe beautiful fruit here to love and show how amazing God is!! And I know that I can't be bound by a number on a scale anymore. I know that I am loved regardless because His word says so! 

So be empowered to break past insecurity and take hold of life that was created for fullness in God! 

Oh and pay someone a compliment you never know what demons they are facing in their head. Be bright and full of love! ❤️